Today’s pet hate

Today’s pet hate is people who get to the office kitchen before me and have to meticulously clean things. It’s not good enough for them to give their cup or fork a quick swishle under the tap. No, they have to use detergent and a scourer. Then they have to dry everything with a paper towel. Now turn it round and dry the other end. No arrange everything in a neat row and wipe down all the bubbles left in the sink, and wipe the work surface. Now move their row of cutlery out of the way and wipe that bit too. And of course all of this is done slowly, while chatting to a friend, oblivious of me waiting to get to the tap. GET A LIFE!

Previous (ongoing) pet hates: (remembering of course that I am an empathetic, tolerant and loving Christian ????)

• coat hangers - always tangled, always breeding in corners of the house, but never there when you need one.


• cat food - the smell sticks to your hands to sniff for the rest of the day.


• dog lovers - they all swear that they poop-a-scoop but the streets are still covered in poo.


• people who drive at 40mph whether they are going round a hairpin bend next to a school or on the motorway


• People in the UK who use the left hand lane to turn right out of a one way street


• TV auditions that mock contestants


• Police cars that park illegally and break speed limits while not on emergency calls


• Things that fall out of cupboards no matter how carefully you stacked them last time.


• People with big expensive cars but can't drive them, e.g. don't have the skill to park them between the white lines.