A colleague – one of our Alpha Course success stories from last year - is being chucked out by his wife. They are currently negotiating about custody and dividing the house. There has been no formal application for divorce, but it looks like this will be the outcome. Obviously I only get one side of the story, but he clearly feels that he has been used by a woman who now wants to just cast him off like old clothes. My colleague is certainly not the initiator of the split.
So he asked my views on remarriage……should someone turn up in the distant future.
It’s easy to be conservative when arguing theology on a blog, but it’s much harder when face to face with a man who has lost his marriage against his will in this way.
I gave him the range of theological opinion on the topic starting with a liberal interpretation of the verse he quote to me, and said that I was drifting towards being more conservative and don’t believe in serial monogamy. So I think I have been fair and truthful without breaking the cardinal rule of counselling – ‘don’t give advice’.
But it made me question again if my present position is right. And if I am wrong on this what else am I wrong about?
And was I an encouragement to him? Or did he leave with a heavier heart? He is certainly reconsidering how quickly and willingly he should travel along the ‘divorce’ conveyor belt.
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