Friday, September 12
But the peace keeps getting disrupted, firstly by the hurt and stress of the failure of Mrs legal case, and now by trouble with the flat we are purchasing for our son. he is back form his honeymoon, and it is still not available. the solicitor keeps finding new things to chase up and the date of completion is slippingbfurther into the distance.
So we have decided to abandon that purchase, and go instead for a rented flat.
So he is now rushing around with his new wife trying to find a flat they like, and we also need to sort references and everything like that.
So i keep getting texts and emails, which does not help me to do my day job!
Also, stranegly enough, this is tied in to decisions about my car. It is due for its MOT test on wednesday, and will need quite a lot of money spending on it to pass. Is it worth it? If we decide not to proceed with the flat purchase, Mrs wants us to use some of the money for a new car. in whihc case it is not worth doing the MOT test at all. But then I need the new car by wednesday - or at worst Friday - otherwise I cant get to work.
It's not really long enough to think about a new car, but the most likley option at present is a second hand Kia.
So we are having to make lots of decisions in a pnic and quickly.
Tuesday, September 9
At the office I found I did not have my door entry fob, stuck on my key ring, which I realised I had left in the boot of the car when scrambling to get the butties from the back. So at lunch time I had to go back on the bus to get the keys.
I could see the keys in the boot, but the doors were locked.
I could call a breakdown van, but it's not covered by the policy and would cost me £80.
I could break a window to get the keys and then call autoglass to fix the window under the policy. But a Christian friend pointed out that the policy would be for accidental damage, not deliberatly smashing it to get your keys back. (Damned Christian ethics!)
So I decided I would have to leave the car there for the night and use the train to go home tonight and back tomorrow, returning with teh spare key which I could remember removing from my pocket thinking "I shouldn't carry this around or I will end up losing both keys at once". I have been meaning to try the train anyway. The ticket costs the same as my petrol; it's just the extra hassle of getting to the station and waiting for trains, probably adding an hour to the journey each way.
I went back to the bus stop for the shuttle back to the office for the afternoon's work. As I got onto the bus I noticed one of the previous passengers handing someone's lost keys to the bus driver.
THEY WERE MY SPARE KEYS FOR THE CAR!!!!
Friday night was an excpetion. I set off earlier than usual and hit rush hour traffic which turned the motorway into a stagnant car park. That took me two hours to get home. Think I'll stick to going home late!
It was well-meaning, comiserating with our dissapointment at not getting ordained.
But of course, this is really not the issue at all! It seems that someone, and it can only be the Vicar we complained about, has been putting out the story that the reason we left was that alleged dissapointment. This is of course another lie to cover up for what he has done and to blame oters for the outcomes of his mess.
So, having decided to leave it to God, we now feel that through this card he is prompting us to write to the warden and to the PCC clarifying the reasons for our departure. There are good peolpe there who deserve to know that we did not lightly abandon the church suddenly. Of course we will have to admit that the authorities did not find in our favour. But as mentioned previously, this is part of the injustice that means that in our new town we are very unlikely to join an Anglican church.
We have done our first draft, and have at least three new points that we need to add. It is very ahrd to write it in a way that factually and accurately explains why we left without falling into childish name-calling and spiteful vengeance.
Please pray that we get it right.
Thursday, September 4
It is the biggest hole with pumps in that I have ever looked into: 40m deep. It has a lift to get to the bottom, with stops at the landings on the way. Impressive!
(Now it would be even better if the pumps didn't keep getting blocked and even better still if the engineers knew how to solve the problem. the problem has been there for 14 years, and i have three weeks to give my solution! Well, my solution starts with a £ sign and has seven zeros after the first number. Oh, and the screens at the top don't work either, and I have to solve that as well)
Wednesday, September 3
We feel very strongly aggrieved by this, though there is no official right of appeal.
The church describes it simply as a 'breakdown of the pastoral relationship'. This leaves my wife in tears, while her persecutor writes triumphant posts about 'defeating the enemy' on the church website.
Our intention is to allow God to provide justice in his time. But it has impossible not to compose (at least in the mind) all the angry and vindictive letters to the Bishop, the PCC, the press etc that come to mind.
At very least, if there has been a 'breakdown of the pastoral relationship' as they admit, and pastoring is what the Vicar is paid to do, then he should still be disciplined and sent for re-training.
Meanwhile, we here that one of his associates, a former curate of the church, has lost her job in the church. As curate she had to do what the vicar said to some degree, but we feel that the Vicar has probably blamed her for much of what went on. This lady was far from perfect in her behaviour towards us, but we would not want her to be his scapegoat.
So it feels as though, like some Mafia don, nothing will stick to him in the courts because he is always able to say taht it was one of his minions taht did it. He is not the Teflon Don, he is the Teflon vicar.
And my wife feels the way that women feel when they have been raped but the police drop the case because there is insufficient evidence, and blame the woman for dressing that way and having a drink. Or the way child abuse victims feel when they pluck up the courage to tell but their case is hushed up to protect people in power.
So what do we do?
The views along the route were outstanding. I normally see this area by day or by evening. This time it was morning, with the mist and the hills glowing in the lightd form the east. Spectatcular!
The only downer was that just after I got onto the dual carriageway it became obvious therewas a police incident on the other side and as we passed we saw at least two lorries; one at an awkward angle up the embankemnt, and one with it's side smashed in and it's load exposed, and also a van with the cab smashed right in. Clearly a very serious incident: I would expect that someone died in the van. That side had been fully closed to traffic which was all being diverted off at the previous junction, with a tailback going for miles. But there was extensive professional traffic management in place so it must have happened many hours earlier.
The daughter is more of a problem.
It's not our fault: we have been trying to contact the available schols for weeks buyt they were all on holiday of course. There is an array to choose from, but many are full, except for the one that is under 'special measures'. Our favourites are a church school which is probablythe best in the town, and a non-religious school which is good if rather bleak and is located conveniently next door to the house we are buying. That practicality is a very important consideration for my non-driving diabled wife. The next choice is another church school whihc would require a transport solution, or an even more dustant Catholic school.
But none of them has returned out calls or emails - not even to say "Sorry, but no". So we have not been able to buy the uniform for her. So today she is doing 'home school' with my wife, who is a teacher anyway.
Tuesday, September 2
Well, here we are in the new town.
The temporary accommodation is cramped but clean and conveniently situated.
My sons school interview went well and he will start there on Wednesday. He will arrange his GCSE options today.
The school uniform shop was manic, with panicked parents sardined into it. If you could harness all that energy and put it into the national grid .......
We still don't know which school our daughter will go to.
Our old house is nearly all packed up. In the end we put so much stuff in the skip that we didn't need removal men to move the rest into the basement for storage, but we may still need them when the sale finally goes through.
The sun is shining. The air is clear. The vistas are spectacular.
All is well.
Sunday, August 31
The letter was the most devastating news we could have. The council has decided that our vicar, who has utterly destroyed my wife's life with the effect that our family has also been blown apart, apparently has 'no case to answer'. They feel it is just 'a breakdown of the pastoral relationship'.
So my wife now feels much the same as those women who have been raped but see the perpetrator go un-prosecuted because the police do not believe her.
It really could not be worse. I think that even f someone had died it would feel better - grief yes but a knowledge that people die. This since of injustice and of being walked on and of having the powers of the church protect each other - as they used to in the paedophile priests cases - it is utterly devastating. I had not known how deeply one can feel hurt. And that is just me; my wife feels far worse than I do as it is her that is being rejected.
And it hurts to know that he will gloat over us, and over those of our children who still go to the church, and over my troubled teen daughter who takes his side, and over my other son who will announce his engagement n the church this morning. How deeply that will hurt!
The natural instinct is to think of all the things we can do to express our pain. I have visualised myself scratching obscenities into the paint of his car, which is his real god. I have imagined burning his house down. I have imagined the letters to the press, the letter to the Archbishop himself, the letter to the PCC ..... but all these things are limited human vengeance and ultimately counter productive.
We know from our recent string of miracles in connection with the house sale and the move to the new town that God is with us, and that he has been planning the move for us, and that he saw this outcome before we did, and even Calvinistically planned it for us. And so we still have faith that we must leave it in his hands. "'Vengeance is mine', says the Lord". And I think that his vengeance will be far more effective than any we could impose. Our God is not all nice and fluffy, he also has anger (just read the psalms!). And he also sees every thought that passes through the dark secret places of our hearts. So I would not really like to be in our Vicar's shoes when the Lord starts to implement his justice.