Reinstating the Readership

Been back at the original church for three weeks now.

I was due for my 5-yearly relicensing in April, but because of having been about to transfer the license to the other church and then unexpectedly moving back to this one, at which I am not currently on the electoral role having been away for 16 months, the relicensing has just fallen through the middle oif it all.  Terrible timing.

But the Bishop has now agreed that after 6 months, just to check that I have settled in, I will be relicensed to this church.

It's a bit frustrating, but I think it is the right thing.  Yes, I am back at my home church.  But it has changed.  there are a lot of new people that don't know me, and it would be hard for them to accept my ministry as -in their eyes - a new comer.

Also, I am unsettled myself.

It was not my choice to come back to this church.  I am almost in a state of shock about it all.  I feel sort of numb, and I don't really know what my calling and vision is.

Out of six services I have attended, I have had theological issues with 4.

Part of me doesn't feel at home here anymore.

Meanwhile, I am going through serious doubts about the faith in general.

I am struggling with 'what is the scripture?'  I was brought up with the idea that it was practically dictated by God to Moses at al.  Yet I am increasingly convinced by the idea of it as a compilation in the post-exilic period.  And i find that this detracts from my view of it as authoratative.  This is compounded by my recent thoughts on the Apocrypha.  Presumable part of the septuagint that Paul had in mind when he wrote in 2 Tim 3:16 All scripture is God breathed and profitable for teaching correction and reproof - and yet the more I read it the more nonsensical it becomes.  It's accepted by most the historical churches, yet taken out by Luther partly owing to its inconveneient doctrines.  But if it is part of what Paul had in mind, then we have to keep it in and review our theology accordingly.

So you see, I'm in a mess.  And if I am to teach, I really need to know what I think.

So I need these six months, and ask you to poray that it will be a time when I am fully re-estblished in the church and in the faith.