Thinking aloud.
Its not as simple as I thought. The church of england response to the government equalities office consultation “equal civil marriage” makes me less convinced about my line on complementarity than I used to be. One theory that I have been taking on board is that homosexual people exhibit characetristics of both genders, and that therefore the image of God (which requires both Male and Female in marriage to be complete) is still fully reflected in a gay couple. But if you have two men who are each [say] 25% female, that still only adds up to 50% of the amount of 'female' required. Mathematically you could argue that a male homosexual [25% female say] should therefore only be permitted to marry a lesbian [25% male, say]. BUt all that assumes that it is a mathematical thing. It may be that just any mixture of the two genderswill suffice and its not a thing that can be expressed mathematically at all.
Another line of thought in my head is that since am fairly Calvinist in my views on predestination, I do believe in a Mr or Miss Right. And so for me to accept gay marriage implies that God has also planned a Mr Right for John and a Miss Right for Jane. And while its easy enough to accept that God is merciful to people in their need, its a bigger pill to swallow that he is actively and premeditatively involved in this way.
I suppose I am still in a position where although I have my ups and downs in theological terms, the reality of a conservative view on these things is that people who try desperately hard with much prayer to cease being gay often end up commiting suicide rather than continuing 'sinning'. For which I admire them - I am not that devoted! But the fruit of the doctrine - suicide - implies to me that the doctrine is wrong. 'By their fruits you shall know them' applies to doctrines too.
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