Photo credits

The Embalse de Riano in northern Spain. The picture was taken by .... me!

Friday, January 3

January blues (I hope)

As focused in my previous post I am having doubts about faith.  And I am also going through a self pity phrase focussing on how I feel that my whole life comprises doing things for other people to the extent that I feel that I don't even know who I am anymore; I have just bern subsumed into an extra limb for someone else.

With these things together I have been contemplating suicide: what method I would use and what my  note would say.  Of course I never would because it would be unfair on the family; which of course reinforces the feeling that I am only living for other people.

Hopefully just january blues, though it has been like this on and off in varying degrees for years.

Is this clinical depression, or do I just need a good kicking?

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